my favorite things to talk about

I've been getting a lot of grief for not updating lately. Here you go my friends.

Yesterday all of my girls were over and I told them that so much was changing: Jenna was engaged and Annie had a baby! They were shocked by both of these things, which is just funny to me. Its great and scary to think about all of these changes though. Jenna is going to live with us and be planning her wedding, and then she's going to be married to Kyle forever. We saw her beautiful ring last night and laughed about how you wait so long to be engaged...and then you're engaged. I imagine its a weird, great, scary, overwhelming, not sure what to do next feeling. I'm really excited to live with Jenna while she's planning her wedding and walk through all of that with her. I love weddings!

Last Wednesday, Jon and Annie had baby Raelyn. Sarah, Mary Ellen and I got to go to the hospital Wednesday evening and hold brand new baby Raelyn and I loved it. Every second of it. Of course I loved it because I love babies, but it was more than that. Everything about being there just felt so real. Annie was on lots of drugs and was really tired and Jon was so good at just BEING there. It literally felt like the room was overflowing with love. It was as if we were sitting in a room and everyone there was completely content. I could have stayed all night. Last weekend (after Shauna's car got stolen!) we took dinner to the Houghtons. They had just gotten home from the hospital earlier that day and the house was bustling with people. Annie's parents were there, Kylie was hilarious, Nick was his usual happy self, the Butler game was on tv, and they were more than okay with Shauna, Sarah and I joining in on their party. Again, I could have stayed all night. I kind of wanted to actually. We were sitting there, laughing with Annie about pumping with the windows open, watching Kylie dance and pose for the camera, seeing Jon serve Annie without even thinking twice, watching Nomeno clean, and loving the chaos and the people and the community, and I couldn't help but think THIS is what I want. I don't want this to come across as me wishing for the future or not living in the present. I LOVE my life right now. I think I have the best life of anyone I know and I am thankful for it constantly. Watching Jon and Annie, holding Raelyn, laying on the floor while Kylie sprayed an entire bottle of detangler in my hair...I felt overwhelmed with the prayer that this, God, is the desire of my heart. I want to have a baby that was created and grew in my body for nine months and finally get to hold that beautiful gift in my arms. I want to sit in the hospital and feel content that there is no where else I'd rather be, with my husband who I can't imagine life without. I want to have kids running around my house and invite people in and then want to be with them so much that I stay in the living room to breastfeed instead of going in the bedroom. I want a marriage that works really well. This is the desire of my heart and my prayer. For sure.






For now, my life is fun. Yesterday all my girls came over and we talked about Wilderness, which is one of my favorite things EVER to talk about! (This post includes all of my favorite thing...Wilderness, weddings, and babies!) I like having all of them together. Then I went to see Tangled with Mary Ellen. She smiled through the entire movie. We got to come back here and talk and cry and I'm just really thankful for her and really, really, really glad she is part of my life. Today, Sarah and I are hanging out. I have fun friends who are really great.

Inside of Me

I read a book the past couple days called Inside of Me: Lessons of Lust, Love and Redemption. It for sure wasn't the best book I've ever read, but it wasn't the worst either. It was a short book all about this one woman's sexual brokenness and her stories. I've been thinking a lot about sexual brokenness lately, due to the sermon series at our church especially, and thinking about it in my own life, in my friends' lives, and in the lives of my wonderful high school girls. Sexual brokenness is so common in our world, in our country that uses 80% of the world's resources, we're also using one another for our bodies. I know that sex trafficking and forced prostitution, and even unforced prostitution, are serious problems in our country and our world, but I have also seen the devastating effects that the misuse of sex has in the lives of girls who look like they have it all. We know as Christians that sex is supposed to be saved for marriage, but no one really talks about why. Its just another rule that is almost impossible to follow, especially with raging hormones and the commonness of sex and sexual images. I think that sexual brokenness is so much more than the few people we might know who have a lot of sex with a lot of people. Sexual brokenness is when we look at our bodies and think they aren't beautiful enough. Its when we dress provocatively in ways that shows the world intimate parts of our bodies. Its when we think that we can separate emotions from physical sexual acts, when the truth is that no matter how hard we try, how many times it happens, or how old you are, it is not possible.

In her book, Shellie says, "It was to prove that if you apply pre-marital sex to any equation- casual sex, friends with benefits, or dating (whether with or without intentions to marry)- there will always be potential problems and many times, very serious, life-changing, detrimental ones, not because sex is bad; as a matter of fact, it's so great and so powerful that you need God's blessing and a marital covering to keep it from destroying you. God's laws concerning sex and marriage are so you can be protected in your pleasure. If God created it, don't you think He would know how to use it better than any of us?"

It's so powerful that you need protection to keep it from destroying you? Wow. What if everyone knew this? What if every girl saw her body as a gift from God, as "bought with a price"? What if we didn't know about this when it was too late and the damage was done? What if people, especially Christians, actually talked about this and about how real the desires are and WHY we have the desires? What if we didn't dress in ways that made boys think about our bodies as objects? What if we didn't USE our bodies as objects?

There are girls as young as 5 and 6 years old in the U.S. that are forced to do sexual acts for economic gain by their pimp. There are lots of things I don't know. I do know that this is not how it was created to be. At all.

skipping class

I'm skipping class today. I've never done this before! Skipping as in all of them. Normally I go to class from 9:30 to 5 on Tuesdays, and today I'm not going to a single one. This is for a few reasons. I've been really careful not to skip class while I'm in college. I know that skipping class is a slippery slope for me. I've only skipped class like 3 times in all my years at Butler and they were all for legitimate reasons, and today I just don't want to go. I always say that I wish I had skipped more class when I was in high school. I didn't ever miss school, even when I was sick because I was so worried about the make up homework. My mom would offer to let me stay home and I never took her up on that because I was defined by being a good student and I didn't know how to do anything else. In college, I've really let go of a lot of that and I no longer feel defined by my grades. I don't find my worth in school and I don't even LIKE it. Its still hard for me to be sitting here right now, because I'm sort of thinking that I should be in class even though I know Latin American societies is a waste of my time, but I really like it.

Here's what I'm doing today.
Writing a paper (that's due today haha)
Watching Harry Potter
Getting caught up on my internship journal
Blogging (obviously)
Planning for our late start meeting tomorrow!
Showering
Driving to Dayton with Michelle to see a Steve Moakler concert.

I'm really excited about the concert and really excited to go with Michelle and to do all of these crazy things in one day. None of it really makes sense(in the normal view) and I'm okay with that. Really excited about it actually!

where I want my heart

I really love being a YL leader. I know people probably think I say this all the time, but I just can't get over it. I just had dinner with one of my favorite girls, and I just don't believe there is an organization that does it better than YL does.

How could it be better than this?!

A lot of the time I feel pressure, like I need to be something for my girls or like I'm letting them down, or like I need to say exactly the right thing and call at exactly the right time and if they are drinking or smoking weed then its because I'm not being a good enough YL leader. I know in my head that this isn't the truth and that I can't control their behavior, and that their behavior is not a reflection of the impact I am making. And all this week, over and over in my mind, I keep thinking that the BEST thing I can do for my girls is not call them more. The best thing I can do for my girls is not swoop in at just the right time. Its not having the perfect piece of advice. Its not making their pain away. No, the BEST thing I can do for my girls is be more in love with Christ.

I've been trying to think of things with this perspective this week: If I got cancer, would this matter? If I got really sick and my life was forever changed, would this matter? Class FOR SURE wouldn't. YL club wouldn't. My insecurities about if I'm living up to the standards I set for myself wouldn't. My "keeping busy" by filling my time with crap wouldn't. My relationship with Christ would. The fact that I talked to my mom on the phone today for 30 minutes would. My relationships with my YL girls would and encouraging words would and laughing with my roommates would. This is where I want to focus my attention and where I want my heart to be.

cancer

On the phone with my mom today, she told me about a funeral she went to for this guy who was way too young to die of cancer. She said that throughout the whole funeral, his 5 year old son laid on the floor and cried out "I want my daddy." I don't think I've ever heard of something more heartbreaking.

I started reading this blog just now that's called "Don't waste your cancer" and is about a 26 year old mom of an 8 month old baby who has cancer and their story. She says,
"the nurse today said, "wow i bet its been a nightmare for you guys since you found out three weeks ago..." i did not respond, but i immediately thought, nope not a nightmare. never occurred to me to think of it like that. not because i am strong or anything, because this sucks. cancer is not very fun at all and i hate it. but i do not hate it because i think its unfair or why me...but mostly because i would prefer not to have cancer. but i trust jesus more than i ever have in my life and i can already see how he is using this in such huge ways and i love it. he is real and he is good. all the time."

I certainly can't make anyone feel better with my words. In situations like this that aren't fair and don't make sense, my words don't make anyone feel better. But this mom talks about how people send her emails and she feels loved and that makes it a little better. That's how I can help. I can show up in people's lives and tell them that I care. That's it. I care.

waiting

C.S. Lewis' daily tweet today says:
"I am sure God keeps no one waiting unless He sees it is good for him to wait."

I've been saying lately that I'm sick of being taught to be patient. I don't think I really mean it, but I definitely, definitely think it. I don't want to be patient about knowing what I'm going to do next year mostly. And its not that I haven't thought about it. Because I have. Its just too early to know what my options really are. In my heart, I'm okay with this, its just in my brain where there is impatience. I think that in learning patience, I'm also learning trust. That's my goal for this year: to learn to fully, completely, wholly trust God. I am GREAT at saying that I trust God. My anxious heart, my complaints, my acting-like-I-know-everything attitude say otherwise. How do I do this? Really, I have no idea.

I think it means that I repeat to myself over and over and over that I am loved by God. I am his daughter, his masterpiece, and that I have nothing to prove. I repeat Jeremiah 29:11 again and again and try to completely believe that God DOES have a plan for me. I spend time remembering that God has shown up in the past. That every summer of my life has been exactly what I needed, and every summer I was at a total loss for what to do. I came to Butler and it was the EXACT place I needed to be. I went to Wilderness and a friend was provided for me exactly when I needed it the most. I have a real community of real people who really know me and is what I prayed for in high school. I know my God hears me. I know my God loves me. I know my God knows what's best for me. I just want to trust all that.

this is long!

This might be long, I have a lot of things to say!

1. My mom just left. I really love my mom. She came for the YL banquet last night and I'm so glad she did. I love that she got to come and see that Young Life is so much more than me sitting and listening to high school drama. I love that she got to interact with my friends and see a little more of what my life is really like. I talked at the banquet last night with Jake and led a game, and I joked with my mom about high school. She really, really wanted me to take public speaking in high school and I always told her I didn't need it. I won, obviously, and last night she finally agreed that I really didn't need it. We went to breakfast this morning and had a lot to talk about and I'm so thankful for her. We talked about how its amazing that she is still sane and normal with some of the things that have gone on in her life. We laughed about how for the FIRST time in her life, she simply doesn't want to work anymore (I haven't even started and I don't want to work anymore!) She bought me groceries and came with enough diet coke and toilet paper to last for an eternity. She came with cute shoes and a flannel shirt because she remembered me talking about wanting one the other day. Sometimes I wonder if my mom gets me, if she understands who I am, and sometimes I think she doesn't. And then on days like today, I don't think I could feel any more loved, and more supported, any more understood.

2. I love the Carmel YL banquet. When I was a junior in high school, I spoke at the YL banquet and told my testimony. Five years later, I told one reason why I love being a YL leader, and led a game at a YL banquet. Its amazing to be in a room of 300 adults who are saying, "Yes. I care." I like to meet the parents of my kids. I like to be in a room of adults who hear truths about teenagers and how life is hard. I like that there is purpose in every part of the night and that we sit in a room full of smiling people.

3. I really love reading other people's blogs. Sometimes that makes me think that other people would love to read my blog too, but I think that's just too much pressure. Plus, what if I decide that I want to quit blogging again, and then a bunch of people keep telling me to do it?

4. For as long as I can remember, I have said that I am ready to get married. Literally, in high school I thought I knew who I was going to marry and I had my life planned out. Since then, lots has changed, including who I thought I was going to marry, but this has been a consistent theme in my life. I have 3 friends who are getting married in the near future. I'm SO excited for these weddings. I'm going to a bridal shower tonight. And for the first time in my life (this sounds stupid, but its the truth) I've realized that I will graduate from college and not be engaged. I just never believed that this was really possible. Now, there are 6 months until I graduate and I'm not giving up hope that I will have a boyfriend by then, but I certainly won't be engaged. I was talking to Mary Ellen a few weekends ago and we talked about the fact that we can't really believe we are going to graduate and not get married right away. If this was a world where I got to pick everything I thought I needed, would I choose to be getting engaged? Yes. Absolutely. But then I think about my friends getting married, about the way their lives are going to radically change in such a short amount of time, and then I think I might be thankful for the way my life is turning out. I love this life. I'm not sure that I'm ready to graduate, move, get married, find a job, figure out how to be a wife and still have friends, etc. I know that one day (hopefully sooner rather than later) I will meet a great guy that I want nothing more than to spend the rest of my life with. When that happens, I will be THE most excited engaged person you have EVER met. And until then, I want to LOVE this life. Love where I am. Love what I'm doing. Love living with two girls that I have so much fun with. Love living freely without attachments. Love what God is teaching and showing me in this time. Love the hope that I know is in my future.

5. I want to make a craft project. I need ideas!

I like

Look at how pretty the sky was the other day:


Today some of my wonderful girls came over after school and we made cookies that were gross.


I like weekends and I like my life and I like talking to friends that I haven't talked to in a while and I like celebrating people's birthdays and I like having two hour long conversations with current friends and I like dreaming about what my future might hold.

I like laughing and I like making pumpkin bread and I like talking with my mom on the phone and telling stories and I like my camera.

I like going to bed at 10 and I like having breakfast with fun girls and I like seeing dads at the grocery store with their kids and I like that in the movie we are watching, she is talking about meeting a guy she really likes and she said "It just happened."

I think I'm believing that more and more recently. That as simple as it sounds, it just happens.

new rules

Yesterday, we were talking about our blogs and it made me want to start writing again. But I'm making new rules.
1. I don't have to do it everyday.
2. I don't always have to include a picture.
Sometimes those two things make me not want to blog and since now, no one will read this anyway since I haven't written in forever, I can be free from them.

Tonight we had YL club, and it felt very community focused to me. I really loved that. Today I skipped one of my classes because I had other stuff to do and my mom told me to. She is really great. On the drive home from school, there was a mom in front of me who kept turning around to look at her kids and was cracking up. For like 10 minutes. And I thought about how many moms spend their time talking on the phone or not interacting with their kids and it was so beautiful to see. Periodically (or like every day) I think to myself, "I can't wait to be a mom." Realistically, I can wait. But I just know there will be something very special about that time in my life.

moving

One moving adventure to the next.

Here is my brother and my dad in his dorm room.

I LOVED my freshman year of college and yet I am really, REALLY glad I never have to do it again.

The van is loaded for round 2 and moving into my apartment tomorrow. Sarah Wright keeps telling me that its going to be okay, but I feel like it is too much stuff to unload and that I am going to be unpacking FOREVER. AHHHH!

birthday

I've been bad at blogging.

Tomorrow my brother is moving to college. Friday I'm moving into our apartment and I can't wait. When I have kids this is going to be so hard.


Yesterday was my birthday. I like birthdays because its fun to have a bunch of people tell you that they care about you. I got a beautiful painting, the sweetest book ever, a call from Colorado, and an entire day with my mom. My 21st birthday was nothing like a typical 21st birthday and I wouldn't have it any other way.

magical

Young Life camp is seriously a magical experience. It is for sure, one of my favorite places in the whole world and I love more than anything being there with girls I care so much about. This year at Castaway, there were 14 wonderful girls in my cabin and Allison who just graduated and led with me. We got to have amazing conversations and the way they have matured in the last three years is stunning. I'm so excited for them, and so excited to be part of the way God is working in them!

EVERYTHING

"I can do EVERYTHING through he who gives me strength" -Phil. 4:13

How many times in my life have I heard that verse. A million. Tonight I was taking down these quotes on my wall that I've had since high school. This was one of them. I can do EVERYTHING through he who gives me strength. I can love someone who seems unlovable. I can be stretched way out of my comfort zone. I can dream of living life differently than people around me. I can have hard conversations with high school girls. I can be free to be myself. I can face challenges. I can BE OKAY in hard situations. I can do EVERYTHING through he who gives me strength.

And then I found "Be anxious about nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, shall guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus" -Phil. 4: 6-7. This has been up there since freshman year of college when we had to memorize it over fall break.

These are both what I need to hear RIGHT now. Crazy how that works.

opinionated

We're making a quilt for my brother and so I spent the day with my mother and Nana. We always joke around in my family that we reproduce the exact same woman generation after generation. Strong-willed, opinionated, driven, honest, type A personality, did I say opinionated? I like to know that when I'm overreacting about something, that at least I come by it righteously.

My nana said, "It's like we are Vietnamese sweatshop workers." We weren't allowed to take bathroom breaks today or anything. My family may not be the most normal, but at least they are entertaining.

I like...

I may never like to cook dinner for my family, but I do like fun colored things.



And this place:


And my mom, and worship at Common Ground, and talking to Katelyn about opening our own photography business, and getting hugs from Ella, and dancing in my car, and my dresser project, and sleeping in my own bed, and especially sleeping in my own bed with a new pillowtop mattresspad.

What I won't be

I want to start blogging again everyday. Well until I leave again for camp and can't for the week. But whatever.

Today Mary Ellen showed me another blog and I loved it. The girl is 21, married, and living this life of being a wife that was so precious. I think I would like being friends with her. And her blog was all about what she has cooked and packing her husband's lunch and all this sweet stuff. And then I felt bad because it was wonderful, but I will simply never be her. I won't like to cook and try making all these new foods and I'm not 20 and married and so on. But then Mary Ellen and Elyse said it was okay and that people will like me for who I am, even if I NEVER like to cook, which is a real possibility.

I also don't think I will ever like to garden. But Mary Ellen does, and I like to take pictures. So that works well.


Tonight we talked about our weddings and made some plans (some GOOD plans) and our future houses and it was so fun. And while I can't even imagine how great that is all going to be, I can't help but think that this, right now, is pretty great too.

no where

I've had an amazing summer. I have learned about myself, been in beautiful places, experienced God working, laughed a TON, hung out with amazing people. Now I'm in Indiana sitting for hours talking with one of my best friends and not really doing anything. And there is no where else I would rather be.

so soon

So many pictures to choose from for this blog! We only have like 4 or 5 days left here. The time has gone by so quickly, I can't even believe it. I can't imagine not being with this group of high schoolers after this week, can't believe that we are going to spread back all over the country and live different lives. I'm so thankful for this experience and what I've learned, and yet so thankful to be going soon and not sleeping on a bunk bed in a room with 7 other girls. Here are a few fun pictures!

monochromatic monday

This is Tyler from the dining hall. They have long days.

This is Joel while playing the game Pterodactyl (that's how spell check says to spell that...) They loved it.

Monochromatic Monday:

Wacky Wednesday:

Followed by 80's night:

Tank Top Thursday:

This is the life.

flour

Welcome to Tank Top Thursday:


Welcome to Tie-Dye Fri-Dye:


Welcome to the Flour War that broke out in the middle of the day:


We have fun. I'm learning a lot about myself and about the way I lead people. I am so thankful for this group of high school kids. So thankful.

the best team

I HANDS DOWN have the best work crew team. The other work crew bosses are tired and their kids complain and I seriously could not have asked for better kids to work with. They are genuine and willing and encouraging. I'll say (while we are all sitting) "can someone go clean the bathroom in the coffee shop" and immediately like 3 kids will volunteer. We clean, and its not glamorous cleaning. Its repetitive and monotonous and is like mopping and cleaning toilets and more vacuuming than you can imagine. And they are continuously so great. More than that, we are having the best time. We have inside jokes and nicknames and are telling our life stories and making Tawashie t-shirts and MAKING A MUSIC VIDEO. I'm not kidding, the best team I could have ever imagined.

friends

I HAVE FRIENDS! My work crew kids are AWESOME. We cleaned all day today and laughed all day and there are people here my age and I love YL camp. Here they are in one of the most beautiful places in the world.

Wyld Life campers coming tomorrow. God is here. I'm so excited.

beauty

This is Castaway during the day. Its beautiful.

This is Castaway at night. Its BEAUTIFUL.

It is going to be 1890244843290 times more beautiful when people are here! Today hooray!

this is a clean room.

This is my room. Its really empty. In a couple days I'm going to be wishing it was this clean and this quiet and that there was a place I could go where no one else is there. Right now all I really want is a friend! Good thing I have Kylie and Nick! Yesterday in the car, we listened to Party in the USA and See You Again about a million times. I taught Kylie how to do the butterfly part of Party in the USA and she was so proud. I wish I had a picture of it.

Tomorrow people are coming, I think. This is the exact same way I felt at the beginning of Wilderness so I know good things are coming. I'm just waiting AGAIN. Waiting seems to be a really big theme in my life lately.

leaving

I'm leaving (in 7 hours) for Castaway, a YL camp in Minnesota. Here are my belongings for the month.

There's also a few things that don't fit. I'm not sure what I'm going to do with them. But I'll figure it out when I wake up in less than 6 hours. I'm a really bad packer. I want to pack everything. Think about what could happen in a month! What I might need!

I might not be able to blog at all while I'm gone. I might be able to once a week. I might be able to once for the month. Guess you'll just have to wait and see.

I hope I meet my husband while I'm there!

I can't believe I'm leaving.

two sessions

Today, I was a real photographer. I took pictures of two "sessions" (that's what the real-deal people say) and it was fun!

Let's start from the beginning...

These are beautiful, outgoing, senior girls who are living life to the full. I knew them last year, they were always the crazy girls at YL club who were jumping around during the songs and acting CRAZY. But then last summer, I was asked to go on the trail with them at Wilderness. I was really scared, I mean I wasn't their real leader and I was afraid they wouldn't like me because I'm not her. But something crazy happens in the mountains of Colorado, and bonds are formed that aren't explainable. That happened to us. And watching them this year has been simply motivating. I am so thankful for my experiences with these girls, and SO excited for them to go to college and see how God changes them.


This is my friend Lindsay and her fiance Thomas. I met Lindsay the summer after my sophomore year of high school at Saranac, a YL camp. We met, and it was basically like we could read each other's minds. The similarities between both of us were remarkable, and most importantly we had matching swimsuits. Lindsay and I just clicked though, and instantly. (This has happened to me 3 times in life, all 3 at YL camps, and 2 out of the 3 I would still say are my best friends. The other one was a boy which just makes life complicated). Lindsay and I went to different high schools, and eventually different colleges, and actually most of our life now is very different. But no matter how long its been since I've talked to her, or the different places we are in life, when I meet her for lunch it is like nothing has changed. We used to sleep over and talk about our future husbands and our weddings and how we are going to be bridesmaids for each other and how we were so excited, and now Lindsay's dream is coming true. SO EXCITED for this girl.

today

Things I thought about today:
1. I love violins. I hope that I marry someone who plays the violin, or birth a child violin prodigy.
2. I cleaned in a dress today. I hope that is a once in a lifetime experience.
3. I love 5th grade girls that still think you are really cool.
4. I can't wait to be a mom (I think that every day)
5. I'm REALLY going to miss these girls.

I'm pretty sure this was their "Pretend you just saw Sarah Briggs!" face. Love it.

community.

Every year that I have worked at a Young Life camp, right before I leave I get really weird. I LOVE working at YL camps and at these camps are some of my most favorite memories. I know this is true, and always, right before I go, I think to myself "Why am I doing this? Why am I leaving? I LIKE IT HERE. I have awesome friends, a better community than I ever would have imagined, people know me and understand me and love me. Why am I leaving?" That's how I feel right now. After about an hour at Castaway I will change my mind, but until Wednesday when I leave I will feel like this.

hello world

I didn't have my camera for a single moment of this day. That basically never happens.

Here's my prayer for today:
"All the empty disappears
I remember why I'm here
Just surrender and believe
I fall down on my knees
Hello world"
-Lady Antebellum

Erica

This is my friend Erica:

I REALLY like her. Freshman year of high school they called us Sarica because we had every class together, and our handwriting is identical, and we took sign language together and used to spell everything we heard. We've known each other since 3rd grade when she used to run away from me on the playground and our friendship has evolved and grown and become more wonderful with every passing year. When I come home from school and when we can squeeze it in, we meet at Chipotle (she also introduced me to Chipotle!) and sit and talk about our lives for HOURS. Literally. Tonight it was 5 hours. I love how we have gone from talking about class and unimportant matters to having real conversations about our faith, love, where we are in life, where we are going, people that influence us, how we are changing, and so much more. I don't talk to very many people from high school, and this is one friendship that I can't imagine not having.

graduation

Three years ago I was graduating from Xenia High School. It was a wonderful day. Today my brother graduated. It was also semi-wonderful. I was thinking about giving my speech and who my friends were and what I was thinking about on graduation three years ago. Its amazing how much has changed, how much I never would have imagined possible, and how things stay the same.

Moral of the story: College is a million times better than high school.

This is my brother and his friend Austin. I made them take this picture and as we were doing it, my brother goes "This is the gayest thing I've ever done." One day he will love it!

awesome!

http://1000awesomethings.com/

This is one of my favorite websites. FYI, today's awesome thing is "Long comfortable silences between really close friends." I agree. Here's other things I think are awesome:

1. Living in the city, but coming home and driving on long country roads with your brights on. There's just something about using my brights that I miss in Indianapolis.

2. Sunsets while you drive.

3. Going to Gap Outlet and having everything in the store 40% off.

4. Getting to the cash register and remembering you have a gift card!

5. Having money still left over on the gift card!

Here's what I think is NOT awesome.

This isn't the actual cat that I'm having issues with. But I came home to find out that one of these DUMB CATS has been peeing in my room. I'm never having any sort of pet when I'm older. EVER.

pictures

I almost forgot to blog today. Laying in bed and everything!

This morning I got a flat tire. I've had more tire problems than you can imagine.

This afternoon I took all the pictures off the walls in my room. It used to look like this:


Now its plain and white and boring.

ella

This is Katelyn and Ella who are two of my favorite people EVER. When I found out at like 3am the summer before my freshman year of college that Katelyn was going to be my roommate at Butler, and when we talked like all summer long, I knew that I was just going to like her. And I was right! Katelyn is one of the strongest people I know and, hands down, one of my favorite people to hang out with.

We've said for a while that we are going to start our own photography business one day. Today was just a little glimpse of that and it was WONDERFUL. One day we have to make that happen.

I love listening to Ella's laugh, I love the way she loves Katelyn, I love that she has the prettiest blue eyes I have ever seen, I love the way she says "HUH?" after EVERYTHING you say, I love that she is not afraid of anything, and mostly I love that I get to watch her grow up.